Voice of Women is pleased to present the BIOGRAPHY OF A WIFE (WHO IS BEING HARASSED BY A YOUNGER WOMAN COMPETING FOR THE ATTENTION OF HER HUSBAND).
Inspired by the success of the 'Chronicles of a Battered Abused Discriminated and Disadvantaged Fatherless Girl-child'----another woman has come forward with her "Testimony of a wife in an existing marriage", who is being harassed by a Young Unattached Woman who is wooing for the attention of her HUSBAND and luring him.
This TESTIMONY brings to LIGHT the Strenuous circumstances of LEGALLY WEDDED OLDER WOMEN, who are facing competition from 'Sexually empowered young women'. These 'OTHER WOMEN' are younger, divorced or free, and compete to STEAL HUSBANDS FROM EXISTING MARRIAGES, by hook or by crook (and other carnal means----by Lure, beauty and looks!). And, then proceed to Sham conversions to Islam, Sham marriages, adultery, and other Social crimes ---if unchecked.
The core issue of the Biography is to look for Solutions for "The Other Women" in our Homes, Community, Society and the Corporate World. The solutions include Counseling, Healing, Family Forums and other Alternative Counseling Forums.
Disclaimer: The Story is told in the first person narrative by the " Legally Wedded Wife".
For reasons of confidentiality, please don't assume the identity of the 'narrator'. The entire story has been placed in custody of certain well-wishers. Names and identities of characters have been masked and changed to protect their identities. Let us call the name of the WIFE as 'Pranati Devi'.
Images used are only representative of the story.
Strong Legal action will be taken in Bangalore jurisdiction, against all those who claim to resemble or know the identity of any characters mentioned in this Biography.
Events are true and character sketches are disguised to protect their identities.
Copyright © 2009 Roshni Pereira and "Pranati Devi, The Legally Wedded Wife"
Biography of a Wife harassed by the "Other Woman": Chapter 1. Chronicles of a Legally Wedded Wife in an Existing Marriage and the NIGHTMARE (not Dream) GIRL
1. Pranati Devi -The Legally Wedded Wife or Narrator
2. Gayatri Devi alias Mata Hari - The OTHER WOMAN luring the Husband in an existing marriage
3. Aditya Kumar-The Husband
I, Pranati Devi am married to Aditya Kumar since last 7 years.
As this is my second marriage, fearing objection from my in-laws Mr. G K and Mrs. Lakshmibai; Aditya and I got married privately on 26.06.2002.
Aditya did not inform his parents about our marriage for the next one and a half years as he was not earning enough money to set up a separate house and was not sure if his parents would allow us to stay with them.
However he had introduced me to his parents and I used to visit them regularly. After the first couple of visits, Aditya’s mother asked me for money. As I did not want to offend her I gave her the money. On my subsequent visits her demands became more and more. She started asking for silver plate, jewelery, and saree etc. As I was earning only sufficient to maintain myself and my son and did not have extra money to meet her demands, I avoided going to their house.
After one and half years of marriage, as Aditya had not yet informed his parents about our marriage, for fear of being stopped from meeting me or even being beaten up by his father and elder brother, I myself told his parents about our marriage.
To our surprise, they did not object to the marriage but put down some conditions for the same.
1. I should disown my son from my previous marriage.
2. We should set up our own house
3. All expenses of our house should be born by me and Aditya to give 50% of his salary to his parents
It is only later that I realized that the reason for condition 1 was so that whatever I earn should ultimately go to them and for condition 2 was that Aditya was detected with Hepatitis B and his parents were unwilling to shoulder the responsibility of either looking after him or paying for the treatment.
As Aditya’s parents wanted us to live separately, I did not agree to their first condition. Due to which they fought with me and stopped talking to me for some time.
I took gifts for Ganesha festival and they accepted the gifts and started taking to me.
As by now Aditya’s health was not too good the doctors advised us against having any children till he recovered fully.
Aditya’s elder brother Ravana who was staying with his parents had now stopped working. He started stealing valuables from the house and sold them. He also borrowed Aditya’s bike and pledged it without his knowledge. He also pledged his wife’s jewels in Aditya’s name. He stole his father’s credit card and drew money from it. All these incidents started coming to light one by one when the creditors started coming to Aditya’s parent’s house to recover the cash. The credit card swindling came to light as the ATM from which Ravana had drawn the cash had CCTV and Ravana was recorded drawing the cash.
Aditya’s father had to mortgage his house located at Sahakar Nagar to pay his son Ravana’s debts.
As he was retired by now he needed more money to repay the mortgage installment and also to finance this frequents trips to various pilgrimages.
Aditya’s sister in law (Ravana’s wife) left him and went to live in Chennai with her parents. She also took her son with her.
She later file a case against Aditya’s parents and Aditya for harassment for Dowry and is now divorced and working.
This was in early 2005, by now both Aditya and I had settle in good jobs and were financially able to manage and average lifestyle. Aditya’s parents now started visiting us and also inviting us home.
Within a couple of visits I realized the reason for their friendliness as they started asking for money. When we expressed our inability to give them money, they started emotionally blackmailing Aditya and started pressuring him for more money.
They also started interacting with Aditya’s female college mates and encouraged them to come and meet Aditya in my absence. Aditya had by now started harassing me and my son and even started beating me up.
One of these women was Kusuma Reddy who was now married but was having marital problems. Aditya’s mother encouraged their friendship. I was not aware of this till August 2006. I got to know about this when I accidentally came across Aditya’s mobile bill and found that he was calling a particular no. at least 3-4 times a day and the call duration were at-least 25 to 60 mins. I confronted both of them and told them that if they did not stop with liaison I would inform Kusuma’s husband Govind about this. After this they stopped meeting each other.
By now Aditya was earning a good salary and had bought a car. Apart from the money need to maintain the car, he gave all his money from the salary to his parents.
During the same time another of Aditya’s NIIT class mates, Gayatri Devi had returned from US. She was married about 5 years back. She was looking for a job and had approached Aditya for help. I told Aditya to go ahead and help her. Aditya got her a job in his company, Axe Technologies. After a few days on a Sunday evening, Aditya had gone to the neighboring shop to buy cigarette. He got a sms on his mobile which he had left behind at home. I saw the sms, it said “I miss You”, I called the no. to check who was sending these kind of messages to Aditya. It was Gayatri Devi. When Aditya returned I asked him what this message was and asked him where her husband was. He told that her husband was still in US and there was nothing between him and Gayatri Devi. I was not satisfied with his answer and started watching Aditya’s activities.
His behavior started changing, every time he got a call he would get up and go out of the house to attend the call. He became short tempered and even started beating me. By December I was fed up with his behavior and when I got a good job in Mumbai I decided to shift.
I told Aditya that my son would stay with my sister till the end of the term and he could move to his parent’s house as I did not want to pay house rent both here and in Mumbai. However Aditya said that he would stay here till my son joined me in Mumbai and take care of his studies.
After I moved to Mumbai, Aditya started calling me frequently and was very nice to me. Even his parents started calling up frequently and stared talking to me very nicely. Aditya even came to Mumbai twice, once when my son had an interview in the school and once when I shifted all the household items.
I had come to Bangalore for two days in on 30th April and 1st May. Aditya took us out for dinner but instead of having dinner with us he was sitting in the car, I felt awkward and went to call him, he was on the phone and he cut the call when he saw me. I phone rang immediately and he picked the call and said I’ll call you later Mukesh and disconnected the call. Mukesh was his boss. I asked him if there was any problem at the office and if so he could go ahead. He assured me that it was ok, I knew he was lying as I had heard the voice on the other side of the call and it definitely was a women’s voice. Later that night he told me that he was talking to Gayatri Devi. That is when I had made up my mind never to return to Bangalore and be in Mumbai only.
After I returned to Mumbai, Aditya started calling me very often and started pleading with me to take transfer and return to Bangalore. My job in Mumbai was very high profile job. I did not have an opportunity of this kind in Bangalore. As Aditya’s, call became intense and very frequent, and he promised to be a good husband and never to beat me up or have affairs with other ladies, I spoke to my colleagues and boss and got a transfer to Bangalore. The role here was almost 4 grades lower than what I was handling in Mumbai.
Finally I returned to Bangalore in June 2007 and immediately purchased a Flat at Sarjapur road, where I am currently staying.
Aditya was nice for a couple of months and again started behaving in the same erratic manner. Beating me up was now very common. He was also visiting his parents every Sunday. I started getting doubts and started keenkly observing him.
The following facts came to light.
Gayatri Devi had changed her job and was now working with Axn Technologies.
She had shifted her residence close to Aditya’s parent’s house.
Aditya’s parents had helped her in getting the house.
She visited Aditya’s parents very often.
Aditya was meeting her every Sunday.
Aditya’s mother used to cook food and send with Aditya to Gayatri Devi to encourage their relationship.
I called up Gayatri Devi and told her to keep away from my husband upon which she replied saying “who the hell was I to tell her that?”.
When I got to know about this in January 2008, I asked Aditya to move out. He left on 19th January, on 23rd January he fell sick, and called me. Before going to get him back from his parent’s house I decided to go to Gayatri Devi’s house and confront her. When I went to her house on the 25th of January, she was not at home. Her father on hearing who I was, threatened to beat me up saying I was coming in the way of his daughter’s happiness. I called up my father-in-law to Gayatri Devi’s house and also asked Aditya to come there and sort the issue once for all. Aditya said he was too unwell to come but his father came. He told me that Gayatri Devi had all his support and I can’t do anything. I went to meet Aditya and ask finally what his decision was.
Aditya promised me that he would return the moment he was well and would want to be with me all his life. He also told me that he had realized his mistake and never would trouble me again. He also promised me that he would never talk to Gayatri Devi again.
Aditya returned on 27th of Jan, and true to his words never spoke to Gayatri Devi again. All was good for about a month and a half. His parents kept calling him but he did not even visit him once in a fortnight. He visited them only once in these 45 days and that too he took me with him.
His parents call intensified and they stated calling him very often. Aditya started avoiding their calls. They also came to our house for lunch once in April. They told me to please send their son at least once in a week to meet them. I told Aditya not to stop meeting his parents. Aditya started going to their house once in a fortnight, by end of April he stared going every week and reverted to his old behavior of fighting with me and beating me. Finally in May when he got his increment, he told me that he is fed up and is taking up a new rented house and staying alone. This clearly indicated that his parents were forcing him for something. I also got to know that his parents were still very much in-touch with Gayatri Devi and she was visiting them regularly.
He told me that he had finalized a house close to Hebbal and would move in by June 1st. From 1st may till 18th may he had not gone to meet his parents, on 19th may he was late retuning from office, and he did not even answer my call. When he reached home I asked him what delayed him, he told me that his father had come to meet him at the office and hence he got delayed. I said that he should have at-least answered my calls and informed me that he would be late. Upon which he got angry, beat me up, packed his bags and left the house. I went to get him back on 23rd as 24th was his birthday, but his mother refused to let me meet him.
Later he told me that as his father has incurred a lot of debts and Aditya need to repay the debt, he will not be staying in a separate house. He is now staying with his parents.
He came on 1st June took us out for dinner, when I asked him to stay back as it was late, he was not willing to stay when I asked him the reason he said that his parents would start troubling him if he stayed. However he called his parents and told them that he was staying with a friend and stayed back.
He never answers my calls when he is with his parents, but is in touch with me and speaks to me regularly, though I make most of the calls. He is now pressurizing me for a divorce on mutual consent. When I refused and told that if he wants a divorce he can apply on his own, he said that would take a long time, so I should help him.
On the morning of 7th July Aditya’s grandmother passed away. Aditya called me and informed me to attend the funeral. When I met him, he was limping, he had told me on Saturday that he had hurt his leg while playing cricket. On 8th morning I tried reaching Aditya to check if he needed any help, he did no respond. I tried reaching him again around 4 pm, but was not able to reach.
I Called Aditya’s father to check if everything was ok, he told me that he and his wife had met with an accident and Aditya has taken his mother to the hospital.
Aditya called me later and told me that his parents had met with an accident and he was attending to them.
I have decided to go and stay at my in-laws place with my husband as I feel that he needs me now in this difficult phase. I am also sure that his parents are pressuring him to divorce me and marry another lady.
I am also aware that his parent’s would try to harm me or force me to leave the house without Aditya. They may also force me to transfer all my assets (House, jewellery and mutual funds in their or Aditya’s name).
I have worked hard for six years to make my marriage successful. I have also sacrificed my career for this marriage. I have taken care of the entire house expenses for the past six years as all Aditya’s earnings were spent either on meeting his expenses for his car, cigarette, alcohol and rest of the money went to his parents. I feel that I have wronged and exploited. This is my last chance to save my marriage and make my husband realize that his parents do not have his well being at their heart but are only selfish in their motive. Aditya is now completely under his parents and Gayatri Devi’s control and harassing me everyday for divorce
In case any harm comes to me, please investigate the case thoroughly. Also All my movable and immovable assets should be given to My son Ramesh who will be 15 yrs in August, and till he reaches the age of 18 years my sister Smritha, whould be the Guardian.
My this act of going to live with my inlaws may make them harm my Son (Ramesh), Father (Murugan), Sisters (Smrita and Rani), nieces (Sumathi and Priya) and My brothers in Law (Vishwa and Shiva).
I request you to please help us in case we face harassment in any form from my in-laws.
By end of July, Aditya’s mother was able to walk. This is when the trouble started again. Aditya and his parents now did not want me to live with them any more, hence they started harassing me. On 10th August 2008, Aditya visited my father and harassed him almost 3 hours forcing him to call me back home and to agree to sign on divorce papers.
The next morning while going to office I saw Aditya’s bike parked in front of Gayatri Devi’s residence. When I went up they were alone in the house. Both of them got angry and started abusing me. The next day, i.e. 12th August is my son’s birthday, Aditya threatened me that that he will ruin my son’s birthday party. After screaming and shouting for an hour when they realized that I would not budge from there, Aditya called his father. My Father-in-Law came and asked Aditya to leave and that he will protect Gayatri Devi against me and that he will fix me up if I did not move from there. Aditya came back after another hour, by now he had calmed down and told me that we will return to my house the same evening and that I should go home and rest. I came to my house and in the evening I wend back to my in-laws house to pack our clothes and come back. Aditya packed just one pair of clothes and said let’s go when I told him that if is coming only to drop me then I am not going back and I will stay there itself. He then went down to kitchen and got a knife, threatening to slash his wrist if I asked him to go with me. I said ok, in the first place you were the one who suggested that we go to my house. In the meantime Aditya’s parents who had gone out came back and seeing them returning Aditya’s became melodramatic, banging his head on the wall, screaming and shouting.
His father called his uncle, as I did not want to stay in the bedroom with v behaving in this abnormal manner; I came to the living room. There Aditya, his parents and uncle started harassing me, on pretext of going to the toilet I went into the bedroom and locked myself and called my sister to come and pick me up. When they realized that I had called my sister and if they did not stop harassing me I am likely to call the police, they calmed down and stated banging on the door only to ensure that I would not harm myself and Aditya pleaded me to open the door so he can pack his things and go with me. After my sister and aunt came, he spoke to them tried telling them that I was misbehaving and then accompanied me to my house even though I was not willing to go.
All these caused a major trauma to me and I was very weak the next morning. Aditya, told me that he was going to office and left at 9.30. I woke up around 12, and was feeling very weak due to heavy menstrual bleeding and called Aditya. He told me that he was on his way back and will be there in an hour. He returned by 1.30 in the afternoon had lunch and slept. By 4.00 pm I was feeling very weak and giddy, I asked him to take me to hospital, which he did. I was given saline and asked to rest for two days and was told not to be troubled and disturbed emotionally.
On Friday, Aditya picked up a fight with me and then called the police telling them that I and my father were harassing him, then after some time he called them backed informed them that he was ok. He then packed his bag and left.
I filed a police complaint against Gayatri Devi, she gave a written apology and promised to leave my husband alone. However, I got to know later that Aditya on 12th August as promised to Gayatri Devi had applied for divorce. He then stated harassing me to give him a divorce. Till date his parents continue to support his relationship with Gayatri Devi and are luring him away from me.
Aditya by nature is a nice man. His behavior has changed drastically after he started going around with this woman and especially with his parents support he is gone completely berserk, using abusive language, threatening, he even tried to harm my career by coming to my office and taking to my boss against me.