Petition to Conduct CBI Enquiry into Murder of Dr J A Mathan

Sunday, 20 May 2012

Husband files petition seeking separation from alcoholic wife

Husband files petition seeking separation from alcoholic wife
May 20, 2012

Alcoholism of husbands has been a reason behind domestic violence and the need for separation. However, recently a husband filed a petition seeking separation from his alcoholic wife.

Alcoholism is one of the major reasons for marital discord and divorce. While the majority of complaints and petitions submitted by women before family courts refer to alcoholism of husbands as a reason for domestic violence and the need for separation, of late there are also cases where wives are accused of being alcoholic.

Recently a husband filed a petition seeking separation from his alcoholic wife

A 30-year-old IT professional came to a family court in the city seeking divorce alleging that his wife was a chronic alcoholic, smoker and also had extra marital relations.

Both of them are IT professionals and were married for almost five years.

An official at the family court said, “At times people file false allegations as well but this complaint looks genuine as he stated many instances.
He said that their house was filled with empty alcohol bottles and he has even spoken to her mother about this.”

An official with the family court, on the basis of anonymity, said that there was a small percentage of such cases.

He said, “There was a case where the husband produced photographic evidence of his wife going out with friends and drinking.

There are cases where alcoholism among women is a problem but many give other reasons as it is a bit difficult for people to believe that women will drink and create problems."

Counsellors added that at times when asked about drinking problems there have been instances when the answer was that the husband and wife sit together and drink and the wife prepares the drink.

A counsellor said, “Lifestyles have changed today, most of these couples are from the IT field. They start drinking with friends or at late night office parties and the husbands do not approve of this.”

Dr Mini K. Paul a psychologist and a family counsellor said that alcoholism creates problems in relationships. She said, “At least in 60 to 70 per cent of the cases alcohol plays a major role.

Most women file for divorce due to associated problems of drinking such as physical abuse, mental torture, hurting children, not taking care of the family and selling things at home.” She also added that alcohol problems related to women are very few.

Another counsellor with the family court said," There are cases where men as young as 27 are addicted to alcohol.

Once addicted to alcohol they might have problems with sexual performance and then they will start doubting whether the wife has extra marital relations.”

Dr Paul added that in certain cases men’s sexual drives would be very high and it would not be possible for women to cope with this.

Dr Abraham K. Joshua, psychiatrist said, “Alcohol problems related to women are very few. They are less than one per cent.

Alcohol issues among men contribute to a lot of problems in the family. Most of them fall into the trap of alcohol either due to peer pressure or mood disorders.

For example if a friend calls, they will go along, it will start of very innocently but later they fall into the trap and are not in a position to get out of this.”

Dr Joshua added that at other times men resort to drinking due to mood disorders. He said, “A person will feel depressed due to a problem, when he drinks the first day he will get a good feeling.

The person will tend to drink every time he has a mood disorder or there is a problem. But here the trap is that to get the same feeling he has to drink a greater amount of alcohol.

And then without his being aware he starts getting addicted.” Social drinking also adds to the trouble.

Dr Joshua said there are three types of drinking

* Controlled drinking: In this group irrespective of whatever problems happen, members will not increase the quantity or the frequency of drinking.

* Problem drinking : This group loses control over drinking and tends to consume more.

* Addiction: This group has problems wherein they cannot do anything without alcohol. They require alcohol first thing in the morning as they cannot do their daily activities without that.

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